Journal Entry

Recent journal entry 6.2.1:

[context: a tornado hit close to my university and the winds and storm damaged most of the trees. It’s an extremely minor case as compared to Oklahoma and past storms]

…The sad thing is how easily I couldn’t stand the thought of staying in my apartment without the electricity. Which brings me to my a few different immediate processing. 

             1. We rely on technology. There’s thousands of people down south who have experienced much worse of a storm. And I couldn’t last but a day before I drove to my parents for a good night’s rest in the AC. I stayed at a friend’s house in the area that was still with power to charge my phone and remain comfortable. I’m thankful I have those outlets, but if I didn’t, how would I react? It makes me sick to think of it, because I know the answer isn’t what I would like it to be.

              2. The Earth. It too groans with chaos and rebellion. Missing the shalom of God. The destruction of trees littered about the roads. It brings me clarity. Our human race is not in charge. We are not in control as we, especially myself, like to think We are creatures residing on a rock covered in water, held by gravity – a force that’s hard to comprehend on its own – being flung in an ellipse at an unfathomable speed (108,000 km/hr or 67,062mi/hr), while spinning rather fast on an axis.  Amazing to think of. But we simply discovered those facts. We did not create the Earth . We manipulate the resources we have thinking we are in control. But the recent storm, one that is minor compared to all over the world. The past years, it is clear we are not in control. I am not. But God is. He created. He has the same power to destroy. Which is scary. But I’m thankful God is sovereign. And He is in the business of redeeming.

         All in all, I wanted to make the point that I have to remind myself often of. I am not in control. Most of us think we are. I have weird tendencies that bring me comfort when I see the uncontrollability in my life. Which is ultimately sin since I’m not trusting God to bring me comfort and the lack of trust I have for his control and working in my life. But God is in control. Even when we don’t see it. Or when we don’t feel like He is. But without Him, how exactly would we be here?