An Experience

10.13.12

Something beautiful happened today.
I was working my desk job this morning when out of nowhere, God gave me the words to speak truth into my boss’s life. Not only is she my boss, but my aunt.

I don’t know how the conversation was started only that the words I spoke; I would not have been able to years back. Nor do I think that I can speak them now. What I understand it that God was using me in her life. Telling her to seek out God. And that he is pursuing her. When I finished talking, she simply said wow. In all my years of knowing you, watching you grow up, I have never heard you speak so quickly and speak so much about anything. My simple response is that I was passionate about it. And she replied with she could tell, but she doesn’t know if that will ever be her.

My aunt’s concept of God is lacking. She doesn’t fully understand, nor do I follow what her life journey has been filled with and how she views god. Through the foster care of IL I was raised by the same abusive mother as she. So I don’t know how she reacted to it. I don’t know what her response was. But I didn’t let that cloud my vision. I trusted that God would deliver her, and that he craved a relationship with my aunt even now. That she is older, but it is never too old or too young to start anew.

It was extremely empowering to watch. By watch, that’s how it felt. I was speaking about why I loved God. How he is so big and powerful. How the Gospel has transformed my entire life without me even realizing it. I spoke about how the Bible is this beautiful story. A story that gives hope to the broken, and the story of Jesus. And how he came to save us from death, to rescue us from our own destruction. I told her how amazed I am when I learn in my field of Chemistry about how molecules work, how small they all are. That I am amazed by it simply because I am manipulating them with heat and light, and other chemicals in the lab, but how I didn’t make them. Man will never make them. But God did. That he made these infinitely small molecules I learn about and try to understand. That he made every last atom we see and don’t see. The machine she uses at work to get sonograms of children, he made that technology and allowed man to discover it. All of these words left my mouth, but I felt outside of the situation. I felt as if I was sitting behind me, or from the other side of the office, simply watching it happen. I couldn’t slow down, and I couldn’t follow the words as they left my mouth. But they did. And it was amazing.

I was moved the entire day how God had moved in me. How God was moving in my aunt. I could see the desire in her eyes. Her interest peaked and that she really did like this new church she was going to. Once I left work, I noticed all the people walking down Main Street. The busy of their life consuming them. Swallowing them whole. But I also noticed a few people walking the trails. As I passed them in my car, I watched as they were stopped, taking pictures of the beautiful trees. Almost everyone cannot resist the autumn leaves. Their colours are so vibrant and so contrasting compared to the green grass and brown bark. But there was one woman who stood out to me. She was taking a picture of a tree also. But the two trees she was focused on had no leaves. There may have been a different reason why she was focused on them. But my exact thought process was this: she appreciated the branches without the leaves. She treasured them compared to all the trees that were full with colour and shining brightly. She found beauty in the barren.
Just as God does.